If you’ve been through something traumatic, talking about it over and over can feel exhausting – or impossible. You might remember tiny details you wish you could forget, or feel completely disconnected.
EMDR therapy for trauma was developed to help with this kind of “stuck” experience, when the past keeps intruding into the present. In this guide, we’ll walk through what EMDR actually is, how it works, and what you can expect from your first sessions. So you know what to expect and can decide whether EMDR might be worth exploring with a therapist.
Quick note: This article is for information only. It is not a substitute for personalised advice from a qualified mental health professional. Please reach out to local emergency services or a trusted crisis helpline if you’re in crisis.
What is EMDR therapy?
EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing. It’s a psychological therapy designed to help people process traumatic or distressing experiences that haven’t fully “settled” in the brain. Instead of relying purely on talking, EMDR uses a combination of focused attention on a memory plus bilateral stimulation – usually side-to-side eye movements, taps, or sounds.
Dr Francine Shapiro developed the method in the late 1980s. It has since been studied extensively, especially in people with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Multiple guidelines and organisations now recognise EMDR as an effective treatment for PTSD and trauma-related difficulties. People often come to EMDR therapy for trauma when they notice:
- Flashbacks or intrusive memories.
- Nightmares or disturbed sleep.
- Feeling constantly on edge, jumpy, or irritable.
- Avoiding places, people, or conversations linked to what happened.
- A deep sense of shame, guilt, or “I’m broken” thinking.
Instead of simply telling your story from start to finish, EMDR helps your brain reprocess traumatic memories so they feel less intense and less defining.
How does EMDR therapy for trauma work?
There isn’t a single agreed-upon explanation for why EMDR works, but EMDR therapy for trauma uses a combination of:
Brief focus on the traumatic memory (Adaptive Information Processing model): Shapiro suggests that trauma changes the brain’s normal processing system. The memory gets “frozen” with all the original images, sensations, and beliefs attached (for example, “I’m not safe” or “It was my fault”). EMDR helps to restart that brain processing.
Bilateral stimulation to remove traumatic memory: It is helpful to make traumatic memories less painful. The therapist asks you to think about that traumatic memory and focus on side-to-side eye movements, taps, or sounds. It makes that memory less emotionally charged over time.
REM sleep similarity: Some researchers suggest bilateral stimulation may mimic aspects of REM (dreaming) sleep. It is a phase where the brain naturally processes emotional experiences. EMDR might be harnessing a similar mechanism while you’re awake and supported in therapy.
You don’t need to fully understand the neuroscience for EMDR therapy for trauma to be effective. What matters is that, session by session, distress linked to the memory gradually decreases and more balanced beliefs about yourself begin to emerge.
The eight phases of EMDR: what to expect?
EMDR is structured into eight phases. You won’t necessarily move through them all in a single session.
Phase 1: History taking and treatment planning
Your therapist talks to you to know your background, current symptoms, and strengths. They’ll ask about the events or themes that might be linked to your distress and check whether EMDR therapy for trauma is appropriate and safe for you right now. This is also where you agree on goals together.
Phase 2: Preparation
Before touching any traumatic material, your therapist helps you build emotional “safety tools”. It includes:
- Grounding exercises.
- Breathing or relaxation techniques.
- Visualising a safe place or calm scene.
- Clear stop signals if things feel too intense.
Good preparation means you’re not just diving into trauma with no support; you’re learning how to soothe your nervous system as you go.
Phase 3: Assessment
You and your therapist choose a specific target memory.
- An image that represents the worst part of the event.
- The negative belief about yourself (“I’m powerless”, or “I’m to blame”).
- A more positive belief you’d like to hold instead (“I survived”, or “I did the best I could”).
- The emotions and body sensations that show up.
You’ll also rate how distressing the memory feels (often using a 0–10 scale) and how true the positive belief feels right now.
Phase 4: Desensitisation
You bring the target memory to mind while following bilateral stimulation – usually the therapist’s fingers or a light moving left and right, or alternating taps or tones. You focus on the image, negative beliefs, emotions, and body sensations.
The therapist periodically pauses and asks, “What do you notice now?” You might notice new memories, thoughts, emotions, or body sensations surfacing. You don’t have to analyse everything; you just report what’s happening, and the bilateral stimulation continues in short sets. Over time, the distress linked to the memory typically reduces, and it starts to feel less raw and more distant.
Phase 5: Installation
Once your distress has reduced significantly, the focus shifts to strengthening the positive belief you identified earlier (for example, “I’m safe now” or “I’m worthy of care”). You have to continue bilateral stimulation hold with this belief in mind and the memory. The idea is to “install” this adaptive belief.
Phase 6: Body scan
Your therapist will ask you to mentally scan your body from head to toe while thinking of the original memory and the new positive belief. If any tension, discomfort, or unusual sensations remain, you should proceed with bilateral stimulation until you feel calm.
Phase 7: Closure
Whether you fully processed the memory that day or not, your therapist helps you return to a grounded state at the end of each session. You might go back to your safe-place visualisation or use relaxation techniques. You’ll also talk through what to expect between sessions – for example, vivid dreams, new insights, or temporary emotional shifts.
Phase 8: Re-evaluation
When you meet your therapist, they ask:
- How does the memory feel now?
- How distressed are you when you bring it to mind?
- Does the positive belief still feel true?
You’ll decide together whether to do additional work on the same memory or move on to a new target.
Who can benefit from EMDR therapy for trauma?
It is helpful for people with:
- Incident trauma (accidents, assaults, and medical emergencies).
- Childhood abuse or neglect.
- Been through violence or disasters.
- Traumatic grief and complicated bereavement.
- Certain phobias or intense fears.
- Some anxiety conditions where trauma plays a role.
EMDR isn’t only for people with a formal PTSD diagnosis. Many people seek EMDR therapy for trauma linked to long-term emotional neglect, bullying, relationship trauma, or attachment wounds that still affect their self-worth today. That said, EMDR may not be right if you’re:
- In ongoing danger (e.g. still in an abusive relationship).
- Experiencing severe dissociation without adequate stabilisation.
- Dealing with certain unmanaged psychiatric or medical conditions.
A responsible therapist will assess these factors carefully before starting.
Benefits of EMDR
People often report that, after a course of EMDR:
- The traumatic memory feels more distant and less emotionally charged.
- Flashbacks, nightmares, and intense physical reactions reduce.
- They feel more in control of their emotions and reactions.
- Their self-belief becomes kinder and more realistic (less “I’m broken”).
- They can talk or think about the event without shutting down.
Several studies suggest EMDR can be as effective as – and sometimes faster than – traditional trauma-focused talk therapies for PTSD.
Realistic limitations
EMDR is powerful, but it isn’t magic:
- It usually takes multiple sessions to work through a history of trauma.
- You may feel worse before you feel better, especially early on.
- It doesn’t erase memories; it changes how they affect you.
- Some people prefer other approaches (like trauma-focused CBT, somatic therapies, or longer-term relational therapy).
The most important factor is often the relationship with your therapist feeling safe, heard, and respected.
Gentle next steps
Choosing to explore EMDR therapy for trauma is a big step. It doesn’t mean your trauma wasn’t real or serious; it means you’re willing to give your brain a chance to process what happened, with support, so it doesn’t have to keep running your life from the shadows. If you recognise yourself in this article – the flashbacks, the avoidance, the sense of being stuck – you don’t have to do this on your own. A trained EMDR therapist can walk alongside you, one phase at a time, until those memories feel like part of your story rather than the whole of it.